New, New Doctor
by cheri1
Summary: 10Rose After the Sycorax are defeated, the Doctor reflects on the events surrounding the Christmas Invasion. One Shot.


I let out an exasperated sigh as I thumb through the clothes looking for a suitable outfit. As comfortable as Howard's jim-jams and dressing gown is, I can't wear them when I'm out defending the universe. I almost froze to death in the duel with the Sycorax leader. It is highly impractical to be walking around like that.

Besides, I want something that will show off my gorgeous, new body. Especially to Rose.

I pick through the assortment of clothes and grimace. Some of the outfits are downright horrible. I have no idea why I decided to keep them on hand. An image of me in my sixth life suddenly pops into my mind and I wince as I remember the multicolored outfit with the multicolored brolly. What was I thinking when I chose that and the cat badge? I'm amazed my enemies hadn't laughed out loud when they saw me. I looked more like the Oncoming Acid Trip than the Oncoming Storm. And I don't even want to think about the whole question marks on the clothes phase.

Thankfully, I have far better taste now in my old age. 

This is why it is so difficult to find something to my liking. My ninth body had worn all black clothes to reflect the darkness that had permeated my soul and my life after the Time War, but that was before my Rose came along. Rose has changed my outlook on life for the better and has shown me that happiness still exists in this world. Now in this new body with Rose at my side, I no longer feel as bitter and angry as I had before I met her. As a result, black clothing no longer interests me.

I let out a sigh as I thumb through an assortment of gaudy clothes on one of the racks in my wardrobe room. I am about to give up hope when suddenly I spy something off to my left. Reaching over I pull a brown pinstriped suit and white shirt off the rack and study it. Not bad. Not bad at all. My eyes drift over and my eyes widen as I notice a long, brown leather coat hanging nearby. I pull it off the rack and stare at it. My eyes alternate between the suit and the leather coat and I smile and hurry off to change into them.

On the way to the little changing area near the dressing room, I pause and look down. I notice a pair of Converse trainers lying on the floor beneath a pile of clothes. I stare at them for a moment, thinking. I'm getting on in years. I'm not as quick as I used to be, and if I'm going to outrun monsters I want to be sure I will have comfortable footwear to do it in. Nodding to myself, I reach down, grab the trainers, and hurry to the changing room.

As I change out of the dressing robe and jim-jams, I reflect on the events over the past few days. Another new body, another new life and now…only three more lives left before I die for good. It's hard to believe that I have been through so many lives now. It seemed like only yesterday that I was on my first life and now I'm nearly at the end of my regenerations. Before Rose, I would have welcomed my inevitable death. After the Time War, I had become somewhat reckless with my life. I had no longer cared if I lived or died and it was only through sheer luck that I managed to hang on as long as I did before I regenerated. Then after all the close calls I have had, I end up dying to save a human girl's life. I smile. It was completely worth it. I sigh as I remember the fear she felt watching me die. I never got to explain the concept of regeneration to her. We were always so busy and it just slipped my mind. Not to mention the fact that after several years being in one body I always begin to get cocky and think that I can handle any situation and take on any foe and come through it all unscathed. It's always as much a shock to me as it is to my companions when my luck runs out and another body finally does die. Time Lords have a high opinion of themselves and their abilities and I'm certainly no exception. I just wish I had paused long enough in our adventures to tell Rose about the regenerations so I didn't have to go through the unnecessary task of trying to convince her afterwards that I was the same man. I was so glad I got through to her and convinced her it was me. The way she was acting I was half-afraid she was gonna knock me on my arse.

I put the coat on and straighten it. Smoothing out the wrinkles in my suit, I pause when I feel the collar. I need a tie. I turn and walk over to a mirror on the other side of the wardrobe room and look through several ties hanging off it. I pick out a red one, briefly take off my coat and jacket, put on the tie, and put them back on. I pause in the mirror staring at myself as I turn my head from side to side. Bending down, I examine my face and run my tongue across my teeth feeling the newness of them. I hope that I'll get used to them soon. Leaning back up, I nod and go to join my adopted family for their Christmas celebration.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I lie awake in the guest bedroom staring at the ceiling. Christmas has come and gone, everyone has gone to bed, and I suppose they've gone to sleep. Not me though. I'm not used to this bed. I'd rather be in my own room on the TARDIS. Actually, I'd rather be in the TARDIS period. I was going to leave earlier tonight with Rose, but her mother insisted we wait till the morning. I agreed to it. After all that had happened, I figured Jackie deserved some time with her before we left again.

I smile to myself. Rose is coming with me. I can't believe she still wants to. I was so overjoyed. I was sure after my regeneration went wrong and I ended up crash landing the TARDIS that she would be too terrified to accompany me again. Rose is so amazing and I would miss her terribly if she had chosen not to come. This past year she has gone from being an irritating little ape to being my strength and my rock. She has helped me get over the horror of my past and helped me let go of a lot of pain and misery. I don't know what I would do without her now.

As I think about her, I glance over at the bedroom door. After a moment I get up, move out of the bedroom and creep down the hall to her room. I pause a moment at her door and then I slowly open it and walk inside. I smile when I see her sleeping peacefully in her bed and I silently walk over. I pause and stare down with adoration at my beautiful Rose, listening while she snores softly. I get down on my knees beside her and stare at her lovingly watching as her eyes move back and forth underneath her eyelids. She is like an angel. A beautiful, loving, innocent angel who loves me unconditionally. Tentatively, I brush a lock of her hair out of her face and smile as I see the soft smile playing around her lips. I pause a moment and then very slowly I put my finger on her cheek and gently run it down to her neck.

"I love you, Rose," I whisper. "I love you so much."

I sigh contentedly when Rose's smiles in her sleep. I don't know if she heard me or not, but maybe deep down in her subconscious she did. I hope so. At the moment, I'm not sure whether or not I could ever tell Rose that I love her to her face. Even though I've gotten over a lot this past year there are still a lot of fears that I have about admitting my love to anybody. Everyone that I've ever loved is gone. I've lost so many friends and family; people that I cared about, but none of them have ever compared to Rose. I'm head over heels in love with her and the thought of losing her is unbearable. What if Rose doesn't love me the same way I love her? I know she is fond of me and I know she harbored feelings for my ninth life. But I'm a new Doctor. Does she still want me in the same way? I'm so afraid of telling her I love her and watching her reject me. So, I'm going to hold off telling her until I'm absolutely sure she won't laugh in my face and walk out of my life. She's so precious to me. I don't want to risk our friendship over a misunderstanding, so despite my longing to shout my love for Rose to the heavens, I'll remain silent for now just to be on the safe side.

I tentatively move my hand up to her head and place it gently on her scalp. I love the feel of her hair. I love the feel of her whenever she's near me. She's so soft to the touch. I love holding her to me and holding her hand. She comforts me in a way that nothing else can. I lean in close to her and breathe in her scent smiling as it invades my nostrils. She smells so good to me, more fragrant than the most beautiful flower in the universe. I could sit here and drink in her scent all night. If I could bottle her smell and sell it, I'm sure I would make a fortune.

Suddenly, I sense her stirring. I look up and my eyes widen when I see her looking at me.

"Oh, I'm…sorry," I say, embarrassed. "I…couldn't sleep and…I was just checking to see if you were alright."

She smiles at me and my hearts melt.

"Are you sure that's all you were in here for?" she teases.

She giggles as I feel myself blush.

"Rose," I say trying to ignore the fact that my face is beet red. "Do…do you really want to go with me in the morning?"

She frowns.

"Yeah. I do," she says. "Why?"

"Well…I mean…I'm not the same Doctor you knew. I'm different and I don't want you going with me if it's going to make you feel uncomfortable."

"You could never make me feel uncomfortable," she replies.

I raise my eyebrow.

"You sure seemed uncomfortable right after I regenerated," I say.

"Well, that's because you didn't tell me you did that," she answers. "I thought you were someone else. It's a little unnerving when you've never seen someone change their whole body before, ya know?"

I smile.

"Well, I'll try not to regenerate again," I say.

Rose shrugged. 

"I won't get freaked out next time since I know you do that now."

She frowns.

"How did you get the vortex in ya, anyway?" she asks. "And how did I get back to the space station and what happened to the Daleks?"

I raise my eyebrow. The Bad Wolf has apparently blocked all memories of what happened to her. Maybe it's for the best. No one should have that much power, especially not a 19-year-old shop girl from London. I hope that thing is gone from her body now. I notice Rose looking at me expectantly and I quickly think up an explanation.

"The Daleks…figured out a way to call the TARDIS back to the space station," I say carefully thinking out my explanation. "I ran inside and found you unconscious so I…tried to start up the TARDIS and one of the Daleks shot a laser through the open door and…it hit the control panel in front of me and opened it up and I accidentally looked at it and the vortex went into me."

I smiled at her, praying to Rassilon that she would accept this explanation.

"What happened to all the Daleks then?" she asks.

"I told you I sang a song and the Daleks ran away."

I grinned at her as she shot me a look.

"No, what really happen to them?"

"I told you, they ran away."

"Yeah, right."

"Rose, they don't call me the Oncoming Storm for nothing," I say. "They're terrified of me. I'm their worst nightmare. They'd rather flee than risk me kicking their sorry metallic hides."

I knew Rose wasn't buying it, but she apparently decided it was pointless to keep asking because she shrugged and changed the subject.

"So…" she said reaching down for my hand. "Did you have fun tonight?"

"Yeah, I've never participated in Christmas celebrations before. It was fascinating."

"Just fascinating?"

I smile.

"It was fun too."

I lean in.

"And you know what the best part was?"

"What?"

"Watching you have fun and seeing you laugh and smile," I say. "I don't see you happy often so it's a real treat when it happens."

"Same here," she says. "You never were very happy, Doctor."

She pauses.

"You seem so different now. You're not like your other self."

She studies me.

"Are…you happy now?" she asks.

I pause and give the question deep thought.

"I…I'm happier now than I was," I say. "I'm not as bitter this time around."

Rose smiles.

"I'm glad, Doctor. I hated to see you sad and upset all the time," she says. "I used to lay awake at night wondering what I could do to make everything better for you so you'd be happy."

I frown. I never knew that.

"Rose," I say. "You do make me happy. When you came into my life, you lifted up my spirits and gave me a reason to live. And when I regenerated I carried that over into my new body."

I take her hand when tears come to her eyes. 

"Tonight was fantastic. I wish every other day could be like today. Cause today has been the best day. Everything I've ever dreamed."

"Ooooo, that's nice. You got a bit of the romantic in ya," Rose says, grinning at me. "You oughta put that sentiment in a song."

I consider that.

"That's not a bad idea." I say. "I could call it…"

I think for a moment.

"Song for Rose," I finish, grinning.

Now it was Rose's turn to blush. My grin widens. She looks so cute when she blushes.

I sigh as Rose lays her hand against my cheek.

"You know, when you changed I wasn't sure if I would like your new body," she says.

"Yes, I know," I said, rolling my eyes." All that stuff about can you change back."

Rose bites her lip.

"Well, I was used to your other self," she says guiltily. "But…"

She grabs my hand and gives it a squeeze.

"I like ya too."

I smile as my hearts leap in my chest.

"You do?"

Rose nods.

"Yeah, you're funny and sweet and…"

She blushes.

"Cute," she says.

I grin.

"I am, huh?"

Rose blushes.

"Yeah, you are."

I lean in close. I pause a moment and take in her scent again.

"Don't forget rude and not ginger," I say.

She chuckles.

"Yeah, rude and not ginger too," she says.

I sigh as I lay my head on the bed next to her. I close my eyes and let out a contented sigh as Rose lays her hand on my back.

"Tomorrow, Rose. Tomorrow we start back on our adventures," I say. "Are you ready?"

"Only if you promise not to crash land again."

I chuckle.

"I think I'm past that now."

I pause.

"I think I am. I'm pretty sure," I say. "I never know. It takes me awhile to get myself sorted out when I regenerate."

"Well, I guess I will have to come along and keep an eye on ya then so you don't die and regenerate and have to go through the mess you went through this morning."

I laugh and put my hand in hers.

"Merry Christmas, Rose," I say, giving it a squeeze.

"Merry Christmas, Doctor," she replies.

"Go back to sleep. We have a big day ahead of us tomorrow."

Rose nods. I smile as she closes her eyes and lets out a contented sigh as she surrenders herself to sleep. Tomorrow is going to be a busy day. A few hours ago, I received a message on my psychic paper summoning me to a ward twenty-six, five billion years in the future. I had no idea who it is but I am determined to find out. I stare at my angel as she snores softly.

"Sleep, my love," I whisper to her. "Tomorrow we're going further than we've ever gone before."

THE END


End file.
